1. Know what you want. Don’t think you know what you want — really, truly 110 percent KNOW what you want. Don’t chase titles in your career or in your relationships. Don’t say you want something just because you have some ridiculous life timeline that includes said something. Don’t think you want something just because you always have and are now in some race to get said something. People change. Wants change. Life changes. Always be able to admit to yourself when something goes stale and never be afraid to be honest with yourself and everyone else around you.
2. Go after what you want. Do you want to live a life of “what ifs� No? So don’t. You never know until you try. You never know until you put yourself out there. You never know until you give something a chance. Maybe you’ll get what you want. Maybe you’ll find out that something is not what you want. And maybe that something won’t wan’t you. But you’ll never know until you are persistent about making what you want happen.
3. Know that if something or someone doesn’t want you, it’s not worth it. Whether it’s a job, a friendship, a relationship, a SHIRT, you can’t force something that just isn’t right. You can — and you will — be persistent about making what you want happen, but don’t force anything. If it’s not right, it’s not right. When you have to try that hard, it’s really just not meant to be.
4. Give second chances. But don’t give third chances. That’s, as I said above, trying too hard. If something isn’t working, accept that it’s not working. Move on. Change it up. Find what and who you’re truly passionate about… because what you’re truly passionate about is going to want you just as badly as you want it right away. Don’t waste your time on someone or something that isn’t sure and doesn’t put in the same amount of effort as you.
5. Understand that you are Beyonce (or Tom Brady if you’re a dude). You are special. You are unique. You are perfect. No, you might not be perfect-perfect (no one is), but you are perfect to at least someone out there. If someone or something isn’t crazy about you and/or takes way too long to decide if they do actually want you, don’t continue to chase after it or them. You deserve better. You deserve the world. And if someone or something can’t see that, b*tch please — NEXT.
6. Always strive for more. Know that it can always be better. Your relationships. Your friendships. Your career. Your wine. Like Steve Jobs said, stay hungry (and/or thirsty). Never settle. Never be “okay†with your life. You’re better than just “okay.†As discussed above, you’re Beyonce. When it comes to success, the limit does not exist.
7. Don’t be happy with your life. Be f*cking head over heels in love with your life. While you continue to strive for more, make sure you are TRULY passionate about what you’re going after… and also make sure what you’re going after is TRULY passionate about you. After all, passion will get you further in life than anything else. Further than happiness, further than wine, further than sex. Passion is what keeps us hungry. It’s what keeps us ambitious. It’s what keeps us alive.
8. Make optimism your best friend. Being passionate about everything in your life doesn’t necessarily mean you’re going to be happy all the time. But then again, how boring would life be if you felt the same all the time? You can’t hit the highs if you don’t hit the lows. So hit those lows and accept it! Don’t cry about it. See it as a challenge and work as hard as possible to make what you want happen. And if that doesn’t work out, strive for something else. Life is a game. Learn to play, accept defeat, and be over the moon when you win.
This post originally appeared on Forever Twenty Somethings.