healthmedicinet

Last night as I was polishing off a pint of Ben Jerry’s Chunky Monkey and a couple of leftover holiday cookies, I decided that I should send my Fitbit on vacation. Nothing sucks the merry out of Christmas and the happy out of New Year’s like realizing that no matter how many steps I take between mid-December and mid-January, I’ll be wearing the excess calories around my thighs well into 2016.

Then, just as I was loosening the elastic on my sweatpants to make room for a few more Snowballs (you know, those irresistible butterball confections dusted in powdered sugar), I came to the even more disturbing realization that the difference between Fitbit and Fatbutt is a mere three letters.

Teetering on the precipice of total gluttony, I wrestled my hand back from the pumpkin pie, hoping to somehow register a few steps in the process, and vowed to remain faithful to my merciless Fitbit. I’ve been wearing the activity tracker practically non-stop since last Christmas but I haven’t quite reconciled the Freudian conflict between my id (hunger and sloth) and my superego (the Fitbit).

In case you haven’t yet developed your own intimate relationship with a Fitbit, here are some facts you’ll want to know: First, President Obama, my favorite humor writer David Sedaris, Republican presidential candidate Ted Cruz and Britney Spears each wears one. I’m not sure why that’s important but it may be to some of you.

Second, there are a number of Fitbit models to choose from but mine tracks steps taken, distance traveled, calories burned, stairs climbed and active minutes throughout the day. If that’s not depressing — I mean motivating — enough, it also tracks your sleep. Or lack thereof, if you share your bed with a snoring husband and 80-pound chocolate lab.

The digital display shows your stats on the go and wirelessly syncs them to your computer and smartphone so you can watch your trends over time. If all this has your eyes glazing over and your head spinning, then you can ignore it and just refer to the illuminated clock and the number of steps you’ve taken before cocktail hour. After that, all bets are off.

While I’m willing to go on record as a Fitbit addict, I’m by no means alone. As of mid-2015, the company had sold over 21 million devices in 45,000 retail stores worldwide. Yet, as successful as Fitbit is, I can’t help but think that with a few modifications, their engineers might have made it even tougher for us to succumb to greed and inertia.

I’m hoping that the New Year will bring these five key improvements to Fitbit technology:

(1) A gentle but insistent electric shock administered each time we reach for that box of Harry David’s Moose Munch (you know, that crunchy caramel covered popcorn with cashews and almonds).

(2) A more persuasive deterrent, such as Nancy Grace’s grating voice, commanding, “Get off the sofa, lardass!” when we hunker down to binge-watch 15 missed episodes of “Homeland” and “House of Cards” on a Saturday night.

(3) A more truthful visual message that streams across the Fitbit screen when we end up 9,900 steps short of our 10,000-step goal. Maybe: “You’re the wrong kind of LOSER!!!”

(4) A self-tightening wrist strap that squeezes the second martini right out of your hand as you curl your fingers around its delicate stem.

(5) A list of all foods consumed throughout the day, including the 63 MMs with peanuts that you sneak out of your desk drawer, one at a time, particularly during times of stress.

Until these modifications are made, I’m afraid my love/hate relationship with the Fitbit will continue. I love the fact that its mere presence on my arm serves as a constant reminder to move more and eat less. And I hate the fact that its mere presence on my arm serves as a constant reminder to move more and eat less.

Even worse, there are those days when I forget to buckle it on my wrist at all and the two hours of vigorous tennis and four-mile power walk around the ‘hood go undetected. My life, meaningless and invalidated without the Fitbit to document my every move. In fact, if I leave the house and discover I’ve left it behind, the feeling of utter panic is comparable to discovering I’ve misplaced my grandchild in Costco on Black Friday. Fortunately, I have neither grandchildren nor a Costco membership, so everyone is safe. But you know what I mean.

The way I look at it, my choice is simple: Fitbit or Fatbutt. Enough said. I’ve only racked up 9,152 steps and it’s 11:25 p.m. There’s still plenty of time to sprint the dog around the block and lug a couple more loads of laundry up the stairs.

Earlier on Huff/Post50:

• “Protein in the morning gets converted into dopamine, which energizes you,” said W. Christopher Winter, MD, Medical Director at the Martha Jefferson Sleep Center in Charlottesville, Virginia. Yes to meat, poultry, seafood, beans, peas, eggs, processed soy products, nuts, and seeds. Go easy on carbs (breads and cereals) and processed foods with lots of added sugar that will make you feel groggy.

• “The best time is right when you wake up. It gets your body used to revving up in the morning. If you can stay to a routine, it’s amazing what it will do to your energy and attitude,” says Dr. Winter. It doesn’t have to be rigorous. In fact, gentle yoga, qigong or tai chi routines have been shown to be very effective in getting the body and brain started for the day. (You can find videos to follow by searching on Youtube.) Twenty minutes is optimal, but an intense five can do the trick particularly in a bright, stimulating environment.

• An Oxford University study found that pranayama or yoga breathing “had a markedly invigorating effect on perceptions of both mental and physical energy and increased high positive mood.” The most common form is called Three Part Breath or Dirgha Breath. You can do it lying in bed: Inhale deeply through your nose, filling up belly your belly first. Expand your belly like a balloon. Continue to inhale, expanding ribs like gills on a fish. When you are completely full, empty yourself slowly but completely, exhaling through your nose. Do six to 10 rounds.

• According to the National Institute of General Medical Sciences, light is the main cue influencing circadian rhythms, turning on or turning off genes that control your internal clock. Roll up your shades as soon as you’re awake. If you can’t get natural light in your bedroom, consider a lightbox or alarm that slowly gets brighter, simulating dawn. If you don’t want to get that fancy, just flip on a regular light as soon as you get up.

• You lose a lot of fluid when you sleep and breathe at night, and unfortunately, dehydration can make you feel sluggish and sleepy. Rehydrating can go a long way in making you feel more alert. You don’t have to chug, just quench your thirst.

• Set your alarm for when you must get up and stick to that. Hitting snooze over and over just leads to fragmented, fitful sleeping and you’ll wake up more tired. If you can’t trust yourself, move your alarm to a place you can’t reach it.

• “Regardless of how well you slept or when you went to sleep, always get up at a set wake-up time,” recommends Dr. Winter. Our circadian rhythm, the biological process that drives your sleep-wake cycle, needs consistency in order to work correctly. Not everyone needs eight hours—some need more, some can get by on less. If you stick to a set wake up time, your body will start telling you when to go to bed in order to achieve your optimal amount of rest. The overall routine will help you get the healthy sleep you need to replenish your energy stores, which means you won’t wake up as bedraggled.

• The best way to wake up refreshed is to get a good night’s sleep. This means:
  No caffeine after lunch since caffeine can be a stimulant and keep you awake. And only one glass of wine at dinner. Too much wine can knock you out, then cause you to wake up during the night.

  Make sure your room is cool. “The drop off in temperature is a natural cue for your body to fall asleep,” said Dr. Winter.

  Don’t exercise near bedtime—it will just rouse your body.

  Stay off the computer—and away from any lit screen—an hour before bed. The light makes your brain think it’s day time. (If you must, download F.lux at stereopsis.com/flux. It’s a free software program that makes the color of your computer’s display adapt to the light in the room.)