Last month, I officiated at the marriage of two wonderful women. This was the first wedding I ever conducted, and it seemed fitting to me that it should be a same-sex marriage. The venue was a historic outdoor market in Philadelphia. Tourists would occasionally wander through as the mandap was being set up, consistently asking:
“What’s that incense you’re burning? It’s so lovely!†(“It’s nag champa.â€)
Preliminary rites are first performed like the cleansing of the space to make it pure and suitable for worship and prayers for the removal of obstacles. After the sankalpam, or dedication, is chanted, the familial lineages of both partners will be chanted aloud for all to hear, which is a way to honor each set of ancestors. The parents of either individual will come and pour water over a coconut held by the couple, symbolizing their blessings over this marriage. Then the spouses-to-be will perform what is my favorite part of the wedding rites, h?daya spar?a. The couple faces each other. They touch each others heart, and recite a mantra:
Love has given unto love.
Love is the giver, love is the receiver.
Love has entered the ocean of love.
I receive you through love.
Oh love, this heart is yours.
I love this part because it is so gender neutral. The mantra does not refer to a woman giving herself to a man or vice versa, but love giving love and love receiving love. It reaffirms the fact that marriage is not an institution reserved for straight couples; it is for two souls who simply wish to give themselves to each other in totality.
The fire is ignited. Lord Agni, god of fire, is the priest of the Gods, and is a divine witness to all marriages. The priest will conduct a homam, chanting sacred suktas and offering ghee into the flames with each chant of “swah?.†The couple will then exchange rose garlands. This exchange of garlands is a universally accepted part of Hindu marriages. It hearkens to the story of how Mother Lakshmi decorated Lord Vishnu with a garland, choosing Him as Her husband over all other gods.
It should go without saying that queer love is no different than straight love. Queer people in love enjoy the same tender embraces as straight, cisgender people do. A wedding between two queer people should not be any different than a wedding of a heterosexual man and woman. Of course, that is easier said than done. LGBTQ people in love might experience the same hardships as straight people do, but in addition to that, they also have to all of the additional trials and difficulties imposed by society’s discrimination, as well as the risk of hate crimes and violence, and the disapproval of family, friends, co-workers and strangers. In light of that, LGBTQ people in love, everywhere, but especially in my faith community, should be lifted up and celebrated. Their strength in the face of opposition should be an inspiration to all.
LGBTQ people are still fighting to give and receive love, for our love to be seen as equal in the eyes of our governments, our families, and our peers. Yet, “Love has entered the ocean of love,†and no one can reverse that flow.
On June 26, the United States Supreme Court ruled that same-sex couples have a right to marriage under the 14th Amendment of the U.S. Constitution. Such a victory should be celebrated everywhere, and for me, the joy I feel is coupled with a commitment to continue fighting until LGBT people receive full equality. Let’s enjoy this moment for we must continue working hard for our collective liberation.
*For more information and scriptural references on this topic, please read Amara Das Wilhelm’s book, Tritiya-Prakriti: People of the Third Sex.
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Rev. Dr. Nancy L. Wilson is Moderator of Metropolitan Community Churches
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Dr. Ibrahim Abdurrahman Farajaje is Provost of Starr King School for the Ministry, Professor of Cultural Studies and Islamic Studies, and Sufi. Taught the first divinity school class in the US on African-American faith communities and HIV prevention.
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Bishop of the Episcopal Diocese of New Hampshire.
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Reverend Ouyang Wen Feng founded a gay-friendly church outside Kuala Lumpur and is thought to be the country’s only openly gay pastor. Although he now lives in the U.S., he frequently returns to Malaysia to call for gay rights, despite the country outlawing homosexuality.
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Imam Daayiee Abdullah is the imam and religious director of Masjid An-Nur Al-Isslaah, and the co-director of Muslims for Progressive Values
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Bishop Mary Douglas Glasspool serves as the Assistant Bishop of The Episcopal Diocese of Los Angeles.
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Rabbi Sharon Kleinbaum serves as the spiritual leader of Congregation Beit Simshat Torah, the largest LGBT synagogue in the world.
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Rev. Troy Perry founded the LGBT denomination of Metropolitan Community Churches (MCC) in 1968.
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Larry Yang is on the Spirit Rock Teachers’ Council and a core teacher at the new East Bay Meditation Center in Oakland, Calif.
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Pastor Manny Santiago is the pastor of University Baptist Church in Seattle, Wa.
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Rev. Scott Anderson is the first openly gay PCUSA minister ordained after the church voted to allow individual presbyteries to set their own ordination guidelines around sexual orientation
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The Rev. Pat Bumgardner is currently the Senior Pastor of Metropolitan Community Church of New York.
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Rabbi Steven Greenberg, the first openly gay Orthodox rabbi, is Director of Orthodox Programs for Nehirim, the organization for GLBT Jewish culture and spirituality.
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Flunder is founder of the City of Refuge, United Church of Christ, in San Francisco and of The Fellowship, an international group of Christian leaders that she serves as presiding bishop.
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Irshad Manji is a Muslim and founder and director of the Moral Courage Project at New York University’s School of Public Service.
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Archbishop Carl Bean founded the Unity Fellowship Church Movement, a primarily African American and LGBT denomination.
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Rev. Malcolm Boyd is an Episcopal priest and author of “Are You Running With Me Jesus?â€
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Coloradem:Justin Lee is the founder and Executive Director of the Gay Christian Network.
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William R. Johnson – First Openly Gay person ordained in a mainline denomination (United Church of Christ) and founder of the UCC Coalition for LGBT Concerns and
Maranatha: Riversiders for LGBT Concerns at the Riverside Church, NYC.
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Rev. Robin Reiter is the Founder and director of Sacred Abundance Ministries
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Founder of the Spiritual Center – NYC, Author, speaker, life coach.
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Jimmy Creech was defrocked by the United Methodist Church and lost his ordination for performing same-sex commitment ceremonies. He is the author of Adam’s Gift: A Memoir of a Pastor’s Calling to Defy The Church’s Persecution of Lesbians and Gays.
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Executive Director of Fig Leaf
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Bayard Rustin was the Quaker activist who not only mentored Dr. King in the principles of non-violent, non cooperation, but also helped found the Southern Christian Leadership Conference. Rustin was the chief organizer of the ’63 March on Washington, as well as of the first Freedom Rides in 1947. Because Rustin was openly gay, he had to remain behind the scenes in the Civil Rights movement, as his sexuality was the target of attacks by anti Civil Rights antagonists.
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Candace Chellew-Hodge is the founder of Whosoever: An Online Magazine for GLBT Christians that was founded in 1996. The magazine was the first of its kind on the internet has continued to be a resource for the LGBT community since then at whosoever.org. She is also the author of Bulletproof Faith: A Spiritual Survival Guide for Gay and Lesbian Christians published in 2008.
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Rabbi Denise Eger serves at Congregation Kol Ami and long time LGBT activist
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Rev. Peter J. Gomes (who passed away earlier this year) was longtime pastor of The Memorial Church at Harvard. He came out in 1991, saying “I am a Christian who happens as well to be gay. Those realities, which are irreconcilable to some, are reconciled in me by a loving God.â€
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Pastor Dennis A. Meredith is the Pastor of Tabernacle Baptist Church, Atlanta, GA
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Pastor Franklin is the Pastor of Agape Spirit Life Ministries in Detroit. She is a leader in social justice and a pioneer in spiritual equality for the LGBT Community.
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Rev. Hayes is the Senior Pastor of Church Of The Holy Spirit Fellowship located in Winston Salem, Nc
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Rev. Jim Mitulski, pastor of MCC New York City, came to MCC San Francisco. Under Jim’s leadership for 15 years, the church entered a period of sustained growth during the devastating years of the AIDS epidemic and shifted from being a place to meet on Sundays into an integrated part of the San Francisco queer community.
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Dr. Herukhuti, Founder of Black Funk: The Center for Culture, Sexuality, and Spirituality; author of Conjuring Black Funk: Notes on Culture, Sexuality, and Spirituality; and practitioner of traditional African and African Diasporic spirituality.
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Archbishop Michael Seneco, the presiding bishop of the North American Old Catholic Church- a progressive Catholic denomination with ministries in 23 states.
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Rev. Dr. Katrina D. Foster is an Evangelical Lutheran Church in America (ELCA) pastor. In 2007 she came out of the floor of her denomination’s national assembly, after which the bishops put forth a resolution allowing them to abstain from discipling lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender pastors with families and not face disciplinary action themselves for not bringing charges against these pastors.
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Rabbi Andrea Myers is the author of the book, “The Choosing-A Rabbi’s Journey from Silent Nights to High Holy Daysâ€, an activist and mother.
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Jay Michaelson is a writer, scholar, and actvist whose work focuses on the intersections of religion, spirituality, sexuality, and law. His newest book, “God vs. Gay? The Religious Case for Equality†shows that the Bible supports equal rights.
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The Rev. Dr. Neil Thomas is currently the Senior Pastor of Metropolitan Community Church of Los Angeles.
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Rev. Canon Susan Russell is the Associate Pastor at All Saints Pasadena, CA, past president of Integrity, HRC Religion and Faith Council.
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Rev. Bradley Schmeling is Pastor of Gloria Die Lutheran Church in St. Paul Led the way for full inclusion of LGBT clergy in the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America (ELCA).
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mjk h4pj:Senior Pastor of Virginia-Highland Church in Atlanta, President of Hope for Peace Justice, Co-Executive Director, Center for Progressive Renewal
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Rev. Michael Hydes is the Pastor of New Light Metropolitan Community Church in Hagerstown, MD
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vagtsama:The Rev. Jeff R. Johnson was one of the first openly gay seminarians in the Lutheran church (ELCA) and a founder of a Lutheran movement to extraordinarily ordain publicly identified LGBT people. Ordained in 1990, Pastor Johnson currently serves University Lutheran Chapel of Berkeley, CA.
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wjfreeman:The Most Reverend George R. Lucey, FCM, Presiding Bishop of the American National Catholic Church. The denomination has parishes and ministries across the U.S.
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lilalexei:Rabbi Tracee Rosen joined Temple Gan Elohim in September 2010. Before coming to Phoenix, she was the senior rabbi of Congregation Kol Ami, a Reform and Conservative congregation in Utah, from 2003-2010. Prior to that, she served as one of the rabbis at Valley Beth Shalom in Encino, California with Rabbis Harold Schulweis and Ed Feinstein. She was ordained in the second graduating class of the Ziegler School of Rabbinic Studies at the American Jewish University in Los Angeles, CA, where she received numerous awards for academic excellence. She also holds a bachelor’s degree in Jewish Studies and an MBA from Washington University in St. Louis, Missouri. Prior to rabbinical school, she was a banker, working for one of the top banking corporations in the country.
Rabbi Tracee, her life partner, and their daughter, recently relocated from Salt Lake City to be closer to family.
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vagtsama:The Rev. Jeff R. Johnson was one of the first openly gay seminarians in the Lutheran church (ELCA) and a founder of a Lutheran movement to extraordinarily ordain publicly identified LGBT people. Ordained in 1990, Pastor Johnson currently serves University Lutheran Chapel of Berkeley, CA
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frank mcmullan:Bishop Christopher Senjonyo, Uganda
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frank mcmullan:Rev Mervyn Kingston, Ireland
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frank mcmullan:Fr John McNeill
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frank mcmullan:Sr Jeannine Gramick
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frank mcmullan:Archbishop Desmond Tutu, South Africa
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Shiranafshi:Cantor Shira Nafshi serves as the Cantor for Temple Beth Jacob in Concord, NH. Her partner, Rabbi Robin Nafshi, serves as the Rabbi for the same congregation.
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Milwaukee30guy:Jeffrey Montoya is an openly gay bishop in the Universal Anglican Church. He is a past board member of DignityUSA and the Religious Activities Director of Milwaukee PrideFest.
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Jakob Lazarus Lbjc:Rev. Gene Dyszlewski is the acting head of Marriage Equality RI and a UCC minister in the state of Rhode Island. As a straight allie, he is a strong political force in the state.
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iSing2u:Pastor of a megachurch, Bishop Jim Swilley came out in 2010 in response to teen suicides
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Tom Lander:John J. McNeill, ordained priest and psychotherapist, has devoted his life to spreading the good news of God’s love for lesbian and gay Christians. After authoring the book The Church and the Homosexual, Cardinal Ratzinger (currently Pope Benedict) expelled him from the Jesuits for challenging Roman Catholic teachings.
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Don Arrington:Jacqui Lewis, Senior Minister, Middle Collegiate Church doing A Bold New (inclusive artistic) Thing. All faiths are welcome at Middle.
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This video is Presiding Bishop Mark Hanson’s response to recent suicides by young people who have been bullied. Hanson adds his voice to the more than 3000 videos in the It Gets Better project with words of reassurance and hope to lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender youth, saying, “You are a beloved child of God.â€
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heysonnie:Janie Spahr officiated at the wedding of Sherrie Holmes and Sara Taylor (shown) and other same-gender couples while it was legal in California in 2008. Charges were filed in church court, and the rulings have gone against Dr. Spahr; the final appeal goes before the national church court next month in San Antonio, TX.
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Susansmith:Ahava Center for Spiritual Living
Lexington, Ky
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ChiRhoPress:The founder and director of Chi Rho Press, the LGBTQ Christian publishing house affiliated with the Metropolitan Community Churches. www.ChiRhoPress.com
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Felicia Park-Rogers:Rabbi Edwards has been the spiritual leader of Beth Chayim Chadashim in Los Angeles for 18 years. BCC is the world’s first lgbt synagogue. This year BCC celebrates its 40th Anniversary year and today continues to be a leading voice in the Jewish and LGBT Communities.
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Angel Celeste Collie:Angel is the leader of Metropolitan Community Churches Transgender Ministries and a two-time Soulforce Equality Rider. He is currently pursuing his Masters of Divinity at Yale Divinity School.
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Mark S King:Prolific writer and gay spiritual champion Rev. Chris Glaser has been advocating for ordination rights for GLBT people for decades within the Presbyterian Church, but his real calling has been reconciling all GLBT people with spirituality and faith.
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Sandra Lawson:Rabbi Joshua Lesser with Bishop Flunder. Rabbi Lesser leads Congregation Bet Haverim in Atlanta Georgia a Gay founded synagogue.
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Pastor Mel Martinez:Rev. Dr. Cindi Love is the executive director of Soulforce, a national organization dedicated to nonviolently confronting and ending anti-LGBTQ (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer) discrimination through relentless nonviolent resistance, as taught by Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King and Gandhi and adapted by Rev. Dr. Mel White. She serves on the “Faith and Religion Council†for the Human Rights Campaign in Washington, D.C. and the Compass to Compassion global coalition working with the United Nations to end criminalization of LGBT lives throughout the world. She is the author of Would Jesus Discriminate? The 21st Century Question. This book is part of a broader campaign to prompt churches, communities and individuals to consider the ways that religious attitudes against homosexuality may contribute to wider discrimination against gays and lesbians.
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RBlaquiere:Rev. Dr. Hawkes, married forst LGBT couples in, despite frequent death threats, Canada as well as showing leadership on several other occasions.
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Co-founder of Soulforce; author of Stranger at the Gate: To Be Gay and Christian in America and Holy Terror: Lies the Christian Right Tell to Deny Gay Equality; and recipient of the ACLU’S National Civil Liberties Award
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Mycroft Masada:Mycroft Masada Holmes is Chair of the Interfaith Coalition for Transgender Equality, a Steering Committee member and Faith Liaison at the Massachusetts Transgender Political Coalition, Emeritus Founding Chair of Keshet’s Transgender Working Group and a board member of Congregation Am Tikva. Mycroft is also a thin ally in the fat / size acceptance and social justice movement. Photo by Meri Bond.
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Noach Dzmura:Noach Dzmura edited the anthology, “Balancing on the Mechitza: Transgender in Jewish Community.†He directs Jewish Transitions (www.JewishTransitions.org), a non-profit that assists transpeople and their communities through conversion and end-of-life processes (both of which are gender-dependent).
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Beth Bloom:Rabbi Judy remains a strong and outspoken supporter of any and all groups who face societal and individual discrimination.
Rabbi Judy is a dear friend and compassionate towards all.
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Caitriona:Caitriona Reed. Buddhist teacher, co-founder of Manzanita Village Retreat in Southern California. She has taught Buddhist Meditation and led retreats internationally for more than twenty-five years. She describes herself as ‘woman of transgendered experience.
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Susan Thomas:In November of 1991 Janie was called to serve as one of four Co-Pastors at the Downtown United Presbyterian Church in Rochester, New York. She was denied that call by the denomination’s highest court in November 1992. In March of 1993 The Downtown United Presbyterian Church invited Janie to become their evangelist to spread the good news by “personing the issue†and challenging exclusive church policies by creating “That All May Freely Serve.â€
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Susan Thomas:A lifelong Presbyterian, Lisa has sought ordination over 20 years. Each time her ordination was blocked through judicial actions. She became Minister Coordinator of That All May Freely Serve in 2007. The case involving Lisa’s ordination has been appealed back up the the General Assembly Permanent Judicial Commission of the Presbyterian Church (U.S.A.) and we anticipate that it may be heard sometime the spring of 2012.
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Scott Taylor45:Pastor Ra’Shawn Barlow-Flournoy was born August 1, 1985 in Spartanburg, South Carolina, the son of Bobby Alice Tanner. Radical, Revolutionary, Innovative, Anointed, and Cutting Edge are some of the words often used to describe Pastor Ra’Shawn. His ministry has inspired many believers around the nation. He has an unprecedented prophetic mantle that distinguishes him as a remarkable visionary who has made a powerful impact in the Christian Arena. Stepping out on faith and the support of 12 people who believed that God was going to do the unexpected, Pastor Ra’Shawn founded Freedom Worship Church November 2008. In 2010 Pastor Ra’Shawn stepped down as Senior Pastor of Freedom Worship to gain a deeper walk with Christ and focus on self. During that time he met Kelvin Barlow at a convocation in Atlanta, GA. May 22, 2011 he married his best friend and the love of his life Minister Kelvin Barlow- Flournoy at the Community Church of Washington, DC. At that moment God spoke to them to ReBirth the vision they thought would never come to past. Together Pastor Ra’Shawn and his partner lead a flock of growing believers at ReBirth Church. Pastor Ra’Shawn is a pastor with a global mission, which is to empower the world and providing spiritual growth prejudice and or judgment of race, creed, color, sexual orientation, social or political standing! He believes that the body of Christ should be empowered in every area of life. His preaching and teaching focuses on empowering believers spiritually, developing them educationally, exposing them culturally, activating them politically, and strengthening them economically. Prior to his role as pastor, he serves as the Prevention Coordinator and Internet Outreach Specialist for AID Upstate in Greenville, South Carolina. He is also the Founder of the Freedom Community Center, a 501 (c) 3, nonprofit organization dedicated to provide an array of individual-level, group-level and community-level programs and services targeting youth and young adults in the community. Pastor Ra’Shawn Flournoy is working on his first book entitled, “The Naked Truthâ€. He also served as a former board member of the National Youth Advocacy Coalition in Washington, DC and the South Carolina MSM Workgroup. Today, his ecumenical messages have been heard on the far shores of South Africa and England.
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Scott Taylor45:Pastor Kelvin Barlow-Flournoy was born March 20, 1984, currently a Prevention Counselor with AID Upstate. He am the second to the oldest in a family of three. I previously served as the Program Director for the Prevention Education Department at The Vision Community Foundation in Atlanta, from October 2009 until He resigned after moving to Greenville, SC in 2010.
A native of Atlanta, Georgia, Pastor Kelvin is a community organizer, activist, supporter, firm about gay political issues, steadfast on equal rights vs. special rights and passionate about public health. He worked as a HIV counselor tester, group facilitator, youth mentor, community health specialist and public speaker since 2005. He plan to earn a degree in human services that will enable him to provide basic human service care. Pastor Kelvin’s motivation is a retrospective of crisis intervention, relationships, human growth and development and behavior change. The power of influence in community deformation, poverty, and substance abuse, and mental health, sexual and spiritual health has provoked a great concern for him in the community and throughout the nation.
Becoming the protégé of a renowned national activist; Pastor Kelvin was destined for a journey that was indescribable. He was diligent to present his self approved to God as a workman who does not need to be ashamed, accurately handling the word of truth. Unbelievable character oozes inside and out of this beautiful young minister. At the age of twenty-seven he married his best friend and the love of his life Pastor Ra’Shawn Barlow Flournoy, and still works to propel himself forward with the hopes of becoming an infectious disease doctor.
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Ross P Allan Chapman:Rev Dr Brent Hawkes, senior pastor of the MCC congregation in Toronto, Ontario. Performed the first same sex marriage in Canada (if not the world) on 14 Jan 2001. A recipient of the Order of Canada and tireless advocate for LGBT, anti-racism, poverty, and women’s issues.
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pasadna:
Canon Woodward is the Chair of the Program Group on World Mission for the Diocese of Los Angeles www.ladiocese.org, and Vice-Chair for the international board of directors of Foundation Cristosal www.cristosal.org, a human rights-based organization dedicated to community development within El Salvador, working together with the Episcopal Church and the Anglican Church of El Salvador www.elsalvador.anglican.org.
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James Walton:Father Geoff was suspended from active ministry from the diocese of Fresno for speaking out against Prop 8 in 2008 in support of marriage equality.
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megancate:Rev. Dr. Robert Shore-Goss, Sr. Pastor of MCC in the Valley, No. Hollywood, CA, has proven himself an activist for not only Gay/Lesbian causes, but also Transgender causes, and in his active promotion of greater Trans voices in ministry.
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MinisterAlford-Saunders:The Sr.Bishop of the Unity Fellowship Church Movement and founding Pastor of Unity Fellowship of Christ Church NYC
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Robin Lunn:
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vagtsama:The Rev. Jeff R. Johnson was extraordinarily ordained on January 22, 1990 alongside the Rev. Ruth Frost and the Rev. Phyllis Zillhart. The three were the first openly gay and lesbian pastors to be ordained in the Lutheran Church. The rite was dubbed “extraordinary†as it occurred outside the regular process of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America. Johnson then served as pastor at First United Lutheran for 10 years. He has served as pastors at University Lutheran and the Lutheran Campus pastor at the University of California, Berkeley since November 1999. Rev. Johnson founded Lutheran Lesbian and Gay Ministry (now Extraordinary Lutheran Ministries) along with his colleagues, Pastors Ruth Frost and Phyllis Zillhart, to provide an outreach to lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people in the San Francisco Bay Area. Rev. Johnson serves on the steering committee of the East Bay Interfaith Committee for Worker Justice and is facilitator of the East Bay Interfaith Immigration Coalition. He is on the Board of Directors for the SHARE Foundation for a new El Salvador. He serves on the Sierra Pacific Synod Council. He is a member of the Sathergate Religious Council and the Spirituality Working Group at the University of California, Berkeley. He is a supervisor in the teaching parish and internship programs at Pacific Lutheran Theological Seminary.
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cllaudia:Rabbi Antonio Di Gesù Antonio
is the rabbi of the Jewish Community Center. He is an advocate for human rights for all people. His blog, gefilte sushi, tells stories of his cross cultural and inter-religious experiences in Japan.
http://gefiltesushi.blogspot.com/
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Swami Dhumavati:The late Ma Jaya was always a fearlessly outspoken and unapologetic gay activist. Even before the beginning of the AIDS plague, she actively supported the gay community, never hesitating to embrace those who society sees as different and promoting openness and honesty about being gay.
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markskrabacz:President of PFLAG – Kerr County (TX); Minister, Unitarian Universalist (UU) Church of the Hill Country, Kerrville; Consulting Minister, San Gabriel UU Fellowship, Georgetown
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Edwin Yates:Director of Formation and Leadership Development of the Metropolitan Community Churchs.
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Winnie42:Rev. Elder Diane Fisher, Senior Pastor of Gentle Shepherd Metropolitan Community Church, has traveled the world spreading the word of God while fighting for justice and human rights.
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celticpadre1:Bishop Gentry who founded the Community of All Saints and Sorts has supported full inclusion of gay people in the life of the church since his ordination in the Eastern Church over 40 years ago and was witnessing gay marriages since that time.
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Pastor Of Good Samaritan Church In Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia