New Year, New Phone, Same Me

The year isn’t so new anymore, and while the to-do lists I made are losing their gravity, my wayward ambition still wakes me up at night. My big 2017 resolution was something along the lines of “Stop comparing myself to others.” I hadn’t put it into words until now because there’s no way for it to avoid sounding like a cheap hook on a site appealing to Millennials riddled with the most basic strain of existential dread. But, let’s go ahead and face it ? I am basic. I’m a creature of Timeline Culture with little to no free will, being corralled into singularity, and here we are again, teetering near the event horizon of yet more phone talk. So be it. I’m back in my motherland, the US of A, with my Verizon upgrade, a 128 GB iPhone 7 galvanized by that sweet life force, Cellular Data. The Apple News notifications are constant and they keep my train of thought from straying too far from Trump, and now that the Internet is available in all 278 underground subway stations for users of the Big Four cell service carriers, I can check in on my contemporaries’ blossoming careers while I hit up soul crushing open mics.