A mother-of-three battled anorexia after her baby weight left her terrified her husband would not find her attractive any more.
Lauryn Bertuco, 24, thought she had overcome the eating disorder as a teenager but it was triggered again after she gave birth to her third child two years ago.
She believed she was overweight at 12 stone (168lbs) and that her husband Anthony, 28, thought she was ugly.
As a result, se cut her food intake and over-exercised to the point she would pass out multiple times a day from malnutrition and exhaustion.
Mrs Bertuco, from Reading in Pennsylvania, lost four stone (60lbs) during her battle with anorexia and bulimia before doctors warned her she risked not seeing her three boys grow up.
In November last year she went to hospital after suffering crippling pains in her stomach, where she was told that if she continued to deprive herself of food her body would shut down.
The warning forced her to enroll in an eating disorder programme and she was discharged last week at a healthy weight.
Lauryn Bertuco, 24, developed the eating disorder after giving birth to her third child two years ago
Fearing her husband Anthony (right) would not find her attractive, she became obsessed with her weight. She suffered anorexia and bulimia but sought help after doctors warned her it was causing her body to shut down. She has since been in a specialist eating clinic and has now reached a healthy weight (right)
‘It started after my third pregnancy, when I wasn’t happy with my weight and due to my body and self-image issues I worried that my husband wouldn’t be attracted to me anymore,’ she said.
‘It felt like I wasn’t happy unless I was hungry, I didn’t feel beautiful unless I was hungry and whenever I ate I hated my body so much I’d throw up.
‘This fear triggered my eating disorder voice that made me stop eating, from there I became very irritable, never happy, was constantly miserable and had no energy.
‘It became impossible to force myself to eat anything, even when I did feel hungry and I knew needed food to function.’
Mrs Bertuco said she would do sit ups and run laps until she passed out from exhaustion.
-
Ever laughed so much you’ve wet yourself? You’re not alone:…
Are you plagued by stomach problems? STRESS is more likely…
All pregnant women suffering morning sickness to be offered…
Let patients refer themselves to specialists, urges doctor…
She would cook meals for the family but then would busy herself with housework rather than sit down and eat.
Her weight loss was noticed and friends and family commented she looked ill.
But Mrs Bertuco said she was never satisfied with the weight-loss goals she hit.
‘Eventually everyone who saw me kept commenting that my ribs and hips were poking out and that I looked sick,’ she said.
‘Even my husband was getting worried because of how skinny I was getting but I couldn’t listen to him.
‘After months of him trying to get me to talk to my doctor about the eating disorder, I was forced to go to hospital because of severe pain I had in my stomach.
‘Later a stomach specialist told me I was severely dehydrated and if I continued I would suffer kidney failure and die.
‘It was a real wake up call, I kept thinking about my kids and worried that if I died they’d would only remember how I never ate and that I cared more about my body than them.’
Mrs Bertuco had suffered from an eating disorder as a teenager but relapsed after baby Sylas was born
She would skip meals and exercise to the point of collapse after becoming terrified she was unattractive to her husband Anthony. ‘It felt like I wasn’t happy unless I was hungry, I didn’t feel beautiful unless I was hungry and whenever I ate I hated my body so much I’d throw up,’ she said
Mrs Bertuco first developed an eating disorder at the age of 16 and would make herself sick on a regular basis until her weight spiraled out of control.
While pregnant with her first son she was able to curb her eating, but after her third child when she weighed 12 stone (168lbs) her condition struck again three years ago.
‘After becoming pregnant I was able to start eating again, but I never told anyone about what I had done before, I was so embarrassed and didn’t want anyone knowing.
‘I’d always had self-image and body issues, in my mind the longer I could go without food the more I had control, but in reality, I was losing control.’
In 2014 her husband caught her being sick and in tears she spoke about her eating disorder for the first time.
This year she enrolled in rehabilitation programme, which helped to retrain her body to start eating again after years of starvation.
‘At first it was really hard, trying to force myself to eat a sandwich felt impossible because my body had been without food for so long.
‘Whenever I ate I felt pain and never knew when I was hungry – it was a long battle but my therapist is really impressed with how well I’ve done’
After going to hospital with crippling stomach pains, Mrs Bertuco, pictured here with middle-born Gage, was told her kidneys would start to shut down and she would die unless she got specialist help
Recovering has been the hardest thing I’ve ever done but I knew I had to do it for my children and I can’t wait to start living for my family again,’ said Mrs Bertuco, pictured here with oldest son Franky during her recovery
Last week she hit a healthy BMI and weight but has been forbidden from looking at the scales while being weighed – to avoid triggering her eating disorder where she would weigh herself up to three times a day.
‘Recovering has been the hardest thing I’ve ever done but I knew I had to do it for my children and I can’t wait to start living for my family again.
‘Back then I didn’t think about anything, I didn’t care about anything, I listened to my eating disorder rather than what was going on around me and how it was affecting my family.
‘I want to be the mum my kids deserve, when it became clear that there was a chance my kids wouldn’t have a mum the thought terrified me.’
The National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders estimate about three per cent of people have anorexia nervosa, bulimia, and related eating disorders.
Tracy Lockwood, an eating disorder specialist, said: ‘When we run out of these existing energy reserves our body cannot function properly and our organs are likely to subsequently shut down.
‘Though little bites of food may prolong the process of starvation, the end results are equivalently dangerous and potentially fatal.’
For more information and support on eating disorders visit B-eat’s website https://www.b-eat.co.uk/