- Becky Deas has Moebius syndrome, which causes facial paralysis
- She is unable to smile, blink or to look to the left or right
- She was offered surgery to allow her to smile but turned it down
- The mother-of-two says she wants to set an example to her children
- Says they should learn people don’t need surgery if they look different
- ‘I might not be able to smile on the outside but I’m always smiling inside’
09:50 EST, 30 April 2014
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10:04 EST, 30 April 2014
A mother who cannot smile due to a rare condition has refused corrective surgery – because she wants her children to appreciate different faces.Â
Becky Deas, 33, has Moebius syndrome, a rare
neurological condition which paralyses facial muscles, meaning she has never been able to smile at her children.
It has also left
her unable to blink or look left and right.
Becky Deas, 33, turned down surgery to allow her to smile because she wanted her children to learn that people should not feel they need surgery just because they look different. She is pictured with her son, Logan
When asked by her seven-year-old son why she had never smiled at him, she explained that her face doesn’t work like his.
Now, she has turned down the chance of surgery to enable her to smile because she wants to show her children how important it is to accept differences.
Instead, she has developed other ways to show them how happy they make her.
Ms Deas, from Manchester, said: ‘This is me, I am who I am and I want my children to accept differences.
‘I might not be able to smile on the outside but I am always smiling on the inside. I make sure my children know how happy they make me every day. I don’t need a smile on my face to do that.
‘A real smile comes from the heart.’
Ms Deas (pictured with her son, Logan) was born with Moebius syndrome which causes facial paralysis
Mrs Deas (pictured, left, as a teenager and, right, with her son, Logan) was born with the condition but says she was not aware of it until she was 10
She added: ‘A lot of people stare at me. I’m pretty sure they must think I’m miserable all the time but that could not be further from the truth.
‘Even I don’t recognise the face in the mirror because it doesn’t reflect how I feel inside at all.’
WHAT IS MOEBIUS SYNDROME?
Moebius syndrome is a rare neurological condition that affects the muscles that control facial expressions and eye movement.
The symptoms are present from birth.
Patients are unable to smile, frown or raise their eyebrows.
They often also have a small chin and mouth and a short tongue.
Dental abnormalities are also common in people with the syndrome.
The condition also affects the muscles that control the eyes so patients have to move their heads to look from side to side.
In some cases, patients are unable to blink or close their eyes which can cause eye dryness or irritation.
Other features of the syndrome include bone abnormalities in the hands and feet, week muscles, hearing loss and delayed development.
Moebius syndrome is thought to affect between one in 50,000 and one in 500,000 people.
The cause of the syndrome is unknown.
Source: U.S. National Library of Medicine
Ms Deas was diagnosed with the condition when she was six months old after struggling to suck from a bottle.
Her parents were warned then she would never be able to smile. But she didn’t become aware of her condition until she was ten.
She said: ‘My parents took me to a conference about it and explained I was different. I hadn’t really notice myself at that point.’
But all that changed at high school when Ms Deas was bullied.
She said: ‘That was the first time I ever wished I could smile.
‘The condition also means I can’t control my mouth so it hangs open and I was called awful names – like fish face.’
She was relieved when she fell pregnant in 2007 with her son Logan and doctors confirmed it was unlikely he would have the condition.
But it was at moments like his birth that Ms Deas wished she could smile to show her joy.
Instead she developed other ways, like using the tone of her voice, to express happiness to him and daughter Lexi, nine months.
Ms Deas
says she did consider surgery to remove a tendon from her shoulder,
which could be used to help create a smile, but ruled it out for the
sake of her little ones.
She
said: ‘As lovely as it would be to be able to smile at them, I didn’t
want my children to think it is necessary to have surgery to look the
same as others.
‘We are all different in one way or another and that is nothing to be ashamed of.
‘I’m delighted for people who do have the surgery, but it just wasn’t for me.’
Ms Deas could have had surgery to move a tendon from her shoulder in to her face to allow her to smile but she decided that it was not for her
Ms Deas (pictured with her baby daughter and friend, Lynn) says she is always smiling on the inside and that she hopes people realise how happy she is despite her lack of facial expressions
Ms Deas held an awareness day earlier this year to help people understand she isn’t glum and to raise awareness of her condition.
She said: ‘I didn’t want to get into the situation of approaching people who are staring at me because that isn’t me, but I wanted to get the message out there.
‘I may not be smiling but I am certainly one very happy mummy.’
For more information, visit www.moebiusresearchtrust.org
Â
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Amanda Knowles,
manchester, United Kingdom,
1 hour ago
I have known becky for nearly 30yrs and I can honestly say shes an inspirational person. She has had it tough and yeah ppl have made fun of her over the years but ehy should she change to suit the ignorance of others??!! People are very narrow minded. She is an amazing friend and a fantastic mum. Her children are like any other children! They are happy and well looked after and her eldest son knows when mummy is cross or if his mummy is happy and sad!! It doesn’t need facial expressions to let him no. Stay as your are Becky. U r a star in my eyes x
no one important,
neverland, United Kingdom,
1 hour ago
What a lovely inspirational story, I take my hat off to you Ms Deas.
Mary B,
Avon, United Kingdom,
1 hour ago
She must have excellent parents otherwise she would not be the amazing person she is now. The word ‘amazing’ is banded about quite recklessly but I think it is wholly appropriate for Ms Deas.
SeverinaSnape,
Dublin, Ireland,
1 hour ago
Good for her. Sure people can’t keep their judging eyes off her but knowing that she actually goes outside to face all of those people is actually great because at the same time it shows her children acceptance of others and how to have self-confidence. Good role model .-.
Veritas,
Avalon, United Kingdom,
1 hour ago
Wow… great woman and an inspiration to the many people who try to make themselves beautiful on the outside despite them being so ugly on the inside. Well done…
Majorca722,
Llucmajour, United Kingdom,
1 hour ago
I understand where she’s coming from… But to be able to smile at your children and for them to realise your happiness… Surely that is above everything else…
MarkK,
Northampton, United Kingdom,
1 hour ago
There will be a period of time where the child is not yet able to understand the concepts of the mother’s reasoning, but does understand people smiling or not smiling.
kelz0okm,
GREAT Britain, United Kingdom,
1 hour ago
What a great example this lady is. She’s a bigger person than I.
khicks26,
Stafford, United Kingdom,
1 hour ago
‘I may not be smiling outside but I’m always smiling inside’ what a lovely thing to say! I’m sure your children know how much you love them and are very proud of their mummy!
HannahBennett4,
Maulden, United Kingdom,
1 hour ago
Hi, my Mum has the same condition and had the operation around 10 years ago now. As much as it taught me that it is important to understand that people are different, it gave my Mum so much confidence post operation.
Before the operation I could read my Mum’s emotions even without any facial expressions through her tone and body language so it was never a problem in terms of my Mum can’t express herself through facial expression. It never bothered me growing up because to me she was my Mum and I never really thought too much into it, I still don’t. She did everything a regular Mum did.
Whether my Mum had or hadn’t had the operation, it was her choice and she did it for her not us which I think is important. It was a big operation and took her time to heal and learn how to use her facial expressions.
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