healthmedicinet

I can create things … I made this.

Having ADHD is like being at the ball, and not knowing how to dance. I can walk, hop, skip, jump and run, but I can’t dance. Do I lead or do I follow? Is this a waltz or a polka? Modern, traditional, square, contredanse, interpretive … I’m lost.

There’s more to life than dancing, but I find that I’m not all that good at a lot of things

Sometimes I talk …

Conversations occur in life. Conversations are made up of words. I know words. I can put them together in sentences. I can make paragraphs, pages, posts and chapters. But in a conversation, if I try to be to creative, I’ll say something that means more than what I intended it to mean. I’ll be witty, clever, smart … then oblivious, inappropriate and offensive. I wish I could talk …

Sometimes I work on things …

Things need doing in life. I can do things. I can fix things that are broken, create things that need to be created, modify things that could be better. Sometimes I do things out of the sheer joy of doing them, who doesn’t want to feel the sense of accomplishment that comes from making something good or better?

Sometimes I see an opportunity to make something better, but I don’t think of all the consequences of my actions. Sometimes I make things much worse. I wish I could see when my actions are going to blow up on me.

Sometimes I’m attentive …

Things in life need my attention. And I can pay attention to things. I can pay attention to anything. I can pay attention to several things at once, maybe even many things. But as the load increases, some things get missed. As some of them get missed I start getting frustrated. The more frustrated I get, the more I am likely to just dismiss some of the things I should be attentive to. Eventually, I become catatonic. Everything will slip and I’ll have a mess on my hands. It will take an awakening, a confession, an intervention or a self intervention, and a new start to bring me back to the starting line. And of course, that leg of the race of life is over, I have to clean up the mess I’ve left, and move to the next segment of the race and hopefully do better. Sometimes the mess is my fault, and other times it just occurred, but more often it was a combination. I wish I could keep on top of what needs my attention.

Sometimes I know what’s important …

In life, some things are important, and some things are just shiny. I don’t always recognize which is which. I try, I make the effort to be mindful, analytical and decisive. But I really don’t have a clue how to do that.

So I often find myself thinking that I have my priorities right, when in fact all I have are my priorities, and they are not only wrong, but they are so skewed that they are hard for even me to explain.

Sometimes I’m a good friend …

In life, there are opportunities to be a good friend. I can do that. Even if I can’t dance and can’t speak and can’t fix everything and can’t pay attention to all the things that need my attention and can’t keep my priorities straight … I can be a friend.

… but I still can’t dance …

 

<!–

And they are apparently too stupid to realize how easy it is to ensure they are called out for their bad behavior.

–>

Comments

This post currently has

0 comments.

You can read the comments or leave your own thoughts.

<!–

33
–>

    Last reviewed: 18 Jun 2013