This article was written by Jessica Migala and provided by our partners at Prevention.
When it comes to your relationship, four is better than two. Couples who spent time with other couples reported feeling more passionately in love with each other, according to a new study published in the journal Personal Relationships.
Researchers from the University of Colorado Boulder and Wayne State University asked one group of couples to engage in small talk with another couple for 45 minutes, and a second group to ask and answer more personal questions (such as, “What’s the greatest accomplishment of your life?â€) with another couple for the same amount of time. Those who talked more intimately with another couple felt closer in their own relationships compared to those who engaged in small talk.
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Bonding with another couple brings you closer to your mate by introducing you both to novel, exciting experiences, which reignites amorous feelings, say study authors. Couple friends can also provide insight and ideas about what makes a marriage work (or doesn’t), and they can offer emotional support, says Kathleen Deal, Ph.D., professor emerita at the University of Maryland School of Social Work and author of Two Plus Two: Couples and Their Couple Friendships.
Making new friends can be tough at any age (and a little awkward at first), but it’s worth the effort. In Deal’s research, people who develop friendships as a couple—rather than, for example, asking your book club buddy and her husband to get together for drinks—were more likely to be in a happy marriage. Why? You’re both equally invested, says Deal.
So how do you go about making friends with other couples without coming off as a couple of weirdos? Think about your shared interests and go from there. Do both of you like to run? Join a running club that meets on the weekends. Or chat with another couple in line at the grocery store. Or sign up to volunteer at a community event. Whatever floats your mutual boat. If you hit it off with another twosome and want to become friends, just casually ask if they’d like to get together—try out that new restaurant in town or invite them over for dinner—and take it from there, says Deal. Who knows, this time next year you could be planning a joint getaway.
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