A mother’s sarcasm-filled rant about children’s selective eating habits has won the support of thousands of other parents online.
UK-based blogger Gill Sims, 38, shared the amusing post inspired by mealtime struggles in her own household, followed by a blunt message to those that try to issue advice to the parents of fussy eaters.
The post on her Peter and Jane Facebook page has since been liked 11,000 times, shared by nearly 2,000 and has attracted some 1,500 comments from other parents thanking Gill for her honesty and sharing their own horror stories.
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Blogger Gill Sims, 38, shared the amusing post inspired by her own mealtime struggles with her children
The post on her Peter and Jane Facebook page has since been liked 11,000 times, shared by nearly 2,000 and has attracted some 1,500 comments
She wrote: ‘The children, you may have noticed, are picky eaters. Mummy has no idea where this comes from, as Mummy is extremely greedy and will eat almost anything, except the travesty of food that is hot tomatoes served with steaks and cooked breakfasts.
‘The Boy Child is not quite as bad as his sister, in that he will quite willingly eat at least three different sorts of fruit, and doesn’t mind peas, but the Girl Child is fearful of all vegetables, and will only grudgingly eat oranges and bananas.
‘This is at least an improvement on her toddler diet where the only foods to pass her lips without screaming were cornflakes, peanut butter sandwiches, bananas, chocolate and chips.
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‘Occasionally she would consent to eat a piece of cheese and Mummy would rejoice, only to be thwarted the next day when cheese was again considered verboten.
‘Once, she voluntarily took a bite of a peach and Mummy wept with joy. Until she promptly spat it out.
‘Mummy is pretty sure in the unlikely event of the Girl Child ever leaving home, she will get scurvy within the first month, as she will never eat anything containing vitamins again of her own volition.
Gill then went on to list the things people should never say to parents with fussy children in an expletive end to the post
‘It was not meant to be like this. Mummy had Annabel Karmel at the ready, although she lacked the Very Important W***y Ice Cube Trays because she bought the book in Oxfam. Mummy DID have a special travel blender though, so that when the Girl Child was a bit bigger, Mummy could whizz up all manner of delicacies in the delightful restaurants Mummy was obviously going to be so popular in with her squawking moppet and her f****g travel blender. Mummy was naïve.
‘The Girl Child soon put her right by firmly rejecting all the many delicious offerings of multi-coloured slime Mummy put before her. The Girl Child eventually would only consent to eat baby food from a jar, and even if Mummy attempted to recreate the contents at home, the Girl Child knew and would reject it. Her favourite was a jar of blackish sludge entitled ‘steak and spinach’ which looked exactly the same coming out as it did going in.
‘People like to put in their tuppence worth if you have a child who is a picky eater, so here are the top six things you probably shouldn’t say to a mother with a fussy child (unless you actually WANT to be beaten to death with a copy of Annabel Karmel), and the responses she is screaming in her head.’
Gill started her fictional blog Peter and Jane based on real life experiences back in February on the suggestion of one of her friends. She launched the accompanying Facebook page in April
She goes onto list those as never telling parents their children will ‘eat when they’re hungry’, that ‘no child has ever starved itself to death or asking ‘have you ever thought about trying them with (insert blindingly obvious food stuff?’
Gill also advises people to never tell a struggling parent that ‘a child has to try something 2348275 times before they know if they like it’ or to boast that ‘my children eat anything.’
Last on the no go list was: ‘You shouldn’t let them get away with that, you know, you’re making a rod for your own back.’
Thousands of parents have commented on the post, sharing their own experiences with their picky children
Instead, she advised people to say: ‘The best thing to say to a mother struggling with a picky child is actually this: “Can I get you a very large f*****g drink?” In fact, that is always the best thing to say to Mummy!’
Gill, who started her illustrated fictional blog in February as the result with a friend about how much she swears, told Mail Online she was ‘surprised’ at the response to the post and the number of ‘supportive’ comments she received.
She said: ‘The post about the children’s eating habits was inspired by yet another mealtime of pulled faces and vegetables pushed round plates, due to my cruel and unreasonable desire to nourish my children and prevent them getting scurvy.’
‘I think at some point all parents feel judged for something or other, and there is always someone ready to offer ‘helpful’ advice, usually right at the moment when you least need it!
Many felt that the post was a breath of fresh air and gave reassurance to mums and dads who are struggling to get their children to eat nutritional food
‘I was surprised at the response to the post, and by how supportive the comments were from other parents who have also struggled/are struggling with their children’s eating – however bad you think your children’s habits might be, it turns out there are lots of other parents in the same boat.’
Among the thousands of parents to show their support was parent Jaime Shaw, who wrote: ‘I always have a stash of chocolate buttons in my bag! I never ate carrot sticks and hummus as a kid and neither does he. My friends’ faces are a picture when their cherubs are scoffing all manner of fruit whilst mine has turned orange from Wotsits. He can learn to love hummus later!’
Similarly, Kate Darbyshire said: ‘I had a fussy eater too… He would only ever eat green Milupa dried food as a baby. When older, he refused meat and would have cheese with gravy on his roast dinners. I am happy to report that he is now an 18 stone, 6ft 3, 25-year-old.’
Leanne Bond commented: ‘This sums up two out of my three children perfectly, I try to smile sweetly when I’m faced with the barrage of “helpful” advice making me feel like a crappy mum. From now on I will tell them where they can shove their advice and will point them in the direction of your page!’
Jo Kenneally said: ‘I have two of these, what a delight. My three-and-a-half year old spent the entire summer eating only (really) white bread Hellmanns mayo sandwiches. Who knew it could be a sandwich all on its own? Prior to that he lived entirely on bananas.
Loren Duly added: ‘This is MY daughter! Little toad lives off rice crackers, sandwiches and chips… oh and fruit. No improvement at age four. I have officially given up and just give her what she will actually eat now.’