Apparently, I’m not alone. Data from Hinge says that 22 percent of its male users have swiped through a dating app while on a date.
Why do we do this? That is a good question. Besides a chronic tendency to check apps mid-pee, a guy swiping left or right while out with another woman could mean he’s just not that into it and is looking for his next opportunity, says Jane Greer, Ph.D., a New York-based relationship expert and author of What About Me? Stop Selfishness From Ruining Your Relationship. “He’s already looking for his next opportunity so that he doesn’t have to deal with disappointment from whoever he’s with,” says Greer.
“It’s a way to disengage and move on immediately,” she says. She adds that it could also mean that the guy is caught up in his own needs and/or may have intimacy issues.
You know, she might be on to something.
Here, guys fess up to the times they fired up a dating app mid-date and why they did it.
“One night, I went on a date after work and I still had some work stuff I planned wrap up after our date. I’d already canceled on her once, and I didn’t want to do it again, so I went. During the date, I apologized and asked if I could check my work email really quickly. When I pulled out my phone, I saw a new Bumble notification. I’d gotten a match. Then, I checked out who it was really quickly.” —Sam F.
RELATED: Ladies, I Need Your Help: Why Am I Getting Rejected on Tinder?
“I’ve done this a few times. Most recently, it was when my date went outside to have a cigarette in the middle of drinks. I don’t smoke, but I could’ve gone outside to stand with her. However, the date wasn’t going that well. So I did some swiping while I waited for her to come back.” —Milo P.
“I’ve never been the best at talking on first dates. I’m kind of shy, I get nervous, and I don’t know what to talk about. Once, when I was doing particularly badly, I excused myself to go to the bathroom. While I was in there, I read over my date’s profile to see if there was anything in there that I could talk about.” —Anthony R.
RELATED: The Piece of Online Dating Advice That Could Change Everything
“I went on a first date with this girl who kept checking her phone and texting people in front of me. I get that this is pretty normal behavior, but not on a first date. So when she picked up her phone, I picked up mine and opened one of my dating apps. I even sent a message or two.” —Chris C.
“I went to see a Broadway show with a girl I’d been on a couple of dates with. After the opener she went to the bathroom, and there was a long line. While I was waiting for her, I pulled my phone out. Before I knew it, I was on Hinge. It’s become a reflex at this point.” —Stephen A.
RELATED: This Is How Many Guys Actually Expect Sex on a First Date
“I have used dating apps while on dates a few times. I don’t think it matters if you do it while you’re on the date. I mean, we’ll both be checking our dating apps as soon as we part ways anyway. It’s not like we’re exclusive or anything.” —Rob F.